Concurring fears

I have run across a blog on Facebook http://www.100dayswithoutfear.com/ It is a young woman who is facing her fears. When trying to look up the blog, it is almost a movement. There are several blogs about facing one's fear, a fear a day for 100 days. For this blog in particular, the young lady who is writing it appears to have lead a very, very sheltered life.

To do this would be to figure out what is exactly a fear. I have spoken in public, sang, acted. I have given presentations for a job. I have dealt with the public. So I am working on what I am actually afraid of in my life.

What are your fears?

For profit business or a church?

"It is not a verdict based on morality or religion. It is based on law. The bakery owners have the right to practice their religion, to attend religious practices of their choosing, and speak their mind on whatever their religious opinions are. But they and their customers were not in church, they were in a profit-making bakery that exists to provide cake for cash. They failed in that task and they are being held accountable under the law." Kerry Anne - Addicting Info.com(http://www.addictinginfo.org/2015/05/19/court-denies-bakery-right-to-refuse-to-serve-gay-people-christian-conservatives-freak-out-images/)

'The defendants are not a religious organization. They are a business for profit. There are no exceptions available." - District Judge Isobel Brownlie  Northern Ireland Judge.

"They are in a business supplying services to all. The law requires them to do just that," said Judge Brownlie.

Bakeries are making the news all over the place. The owners of the bakery in Oregon still refuse to believe that they were doing anything wrong. This bakery in Belfast Ireland follows suit claiming that decorating a cake in a certain way violates their religious beliefs. One thing that I have noticed is that over and over again in many wedding videos. I have heard that bakers want to sit down with the bride and groom to get to know them to make a cake that will honor their marriage. Doing so allows them to participate in a small way. While it is a romantic ideal, the baker forgets that this is a business contract. They are not actually a part of the wedding aside from product bought in their store. A cold assessment but nevertheless a true one.

Christians want the right to discriminate against anything that they feel uncomfortable with outside of their little lives. This discrimination just doesn't apply to the LGBT community. A person could come up into their shop with a motorcycle leather jacket and be perceived as a Hell's Angel member. Ooooohhh this person could be a devil worshipper.

The ministry of Christ was to reach out to the people who lived on the edges of polite society. He sat, ate and drank with prostitutes, tax collectors, the un-educated, the sick and fishermen. He didn't condemn them for their decisions. He recognized the decisions, but didn't judge them for it. Jesus' reaction was so now that you know, you can choose another path. You can choose another direction. No one is tied to the past if they choose to break from it.

Hate the sin, but not the sinner. Nice words but here in this country and others like Uganda. Hate the sin because of the sin is standard. When I have done my reading and cross reading. Love between people of the same sex was never discouraged. Yet where the sin happened is somewhere in the sexual expression of that love, and, when that sexual expression is done in the name of another god. This is my opinion, and, what has been revealed to me in my walk of faith.

So this becomes another part of the culture of fear that is so prevalent in this country. This country that wants to be so proud of its diversity, hates, Hates, HATES, anything that is perceived as different. The story of Jonathan and David is in the bible for a reason. It is danced around so much that it is forgotten when any of the arguments come up. Yet it is said that their love for each other surpassed the love of a man and a woman. One felt when the other was hurt. Hmmmm sounds like love to me. 

So I am a gay man. Very happy to be a gay man. I grew up Roman Catholic. I left the Catholic Church and became a "Born-Again" believe. From there, I moved on to being Pentecostal, to Evangelical, to nothing, on to now someone who is looking for the truth and searching more than just the bible. The "pagans" have many things that are right. So do the Muslims, Hindus, Buddhist and the many other religions of the world. There are certain bedrock truths that they all stand upon. There is more out there. I believe that it is my duty to find out.

Refusing to bake and decorate a cake is childish. If as a business you want to refuse service. Refuse service at the absolute beginning. Do not take a deposit. If you are a church, then you can stand on moral ground. If you are a business, then give to Caesar what is Caesar's.

Praying, it has been a long, long couple of years.



The first two photos of are the right and left sides of my ankle with the stitches in place. The second set of photos are one month later after the stitches have been taken out and the scars healed.

 

 

 

 

It has only been a little over a month since my ankle broke in two places. When I saw the orthopedist, the doctor stated that the bones are knitting together progressively well. They are still not totally healed, but right on tract.

 

Now it is the matter of finding work. I have been hoping to get a job in one of the local hospitals, but that seems like a lost cause. I am over qualified for the jobs I have been applying. So now the job search goes back to working retail jobs.

 

The anger that is being carried inside me is still growing. It does not have a good outlet, because it would just get a bunch of "I'm sorry." The anger and the apologies would not change anything.



Sunday evening and "Idle Hands"

One of the "most" oh so exciting things that have happened lately has been my sciatica acting up because of sitting wrong on the couch. Pinching a nerve that runs down the left leg has encouraged the want of a Charlie horse. Something thing that I am familiar with in my calves but I do not necessarily want them in my thigh. I have two weeks left until the first month of healing has happened. Putting weight on my foot sends shocks of pain at the ankle. So I am going to wait until the doctor gives me the go ahead.... with the next x-ray.

I have finally come up with a name of a company to do business under: "Idle Hands." Following the old saying that "idles hands are the devil's playground," in other words, keep busy.

Something that I have learned quite a bit of while I have been healing. I could have been doing so much more with my hands. I have just been sitting on my ass. So in the pass couple of days, I have been looking for projects to do to sell. I need to make some money to fill the coffers. My coffers are getting lower and lower. I don't trust my roommate every time I send her out with my credit card. She always seems to lose the receipt, or comes home with two. What she forgets is that I see the bank statement. She spends more than she says.

So anyway, I think that this is my opportunity to come up with ideas for the "boss" so that we can make some money. I have seen a few ideas that I believe that I can reproduce. There is also going to the library to find additional books with patterns. There is a book in the local library, that I hope to check out and grab some ideas from it as well. I am starting to look through the books I have to find any ideas from them. I should start putting the books up for sale to get rid of the excess that I have. I need to start getting photos of everything that I have here ready for sale in July for the Christmas "rush". I just need to remember no international send outs, unless they pay for the shipping.

Well anyway this is the plan....

And soon this blog will turn into a combination of postings of stories, for sale items and brief rants.

Jude